Thursday, June 24, 2010

Asking is the hardest part

One of the items looming on my to-do list for quite some time now has been to figure out who is going to do hair and makeup for the wedding.  I've toyed with the idea of doing my own makeup, but there's no way in hell I'm doing my own hair.  It's far too difficult to deal with to take on that stress all by myself on my wedding day.  I've emailed dozens of hair and makeup artists in my area and received quotes that have been pretty consistent across the board - consistently WAY too expensive (remind me why I live near L.A. again???).  I found a couple of places that are affordable, but their portfolio's are less than stellar, in my opinion.  Since I just want simple hair and makeup they could probably do the job just fine, but I'd have to trek up the mountains to do a trial run, and I'm lazy.

This would put most brides in a really tough spot with some hard decisions to make.  But for me, there's an easy solution.  My Aunt has confirmed that she is coming to the wedding.  This aunt has been doing hair for 20+ years and owns her own (very successful) salon.  And a friend of mine is a makeup artist at Sephora.  She was actually recruited by Sephora to help them open a new store near where we live.  So, in other words, I've got friendors who can handle this situation and save me a ton of moola.

But I am having the hardest time working up the nerve to ask.  The last thing I want is for them to feel like they have to say yes even though they don't want to.  I hate the thought of making my Aunt feel like she's working when she's coming a long way, and spending a lot of money, to get to California for the wedding.  But at the same time, I'd love it if she did my hair.  It would be like old times.  When she was in beauty school I was her test dummy.  She even gave me a perm when I was 7 years old!  (And yes, it was awesome).  I do recognize the flip side, that maybe she would be really excited to do my hair.  But still.  It's hard to ask.

Maybe I'll have my Mom ask my Aunt to get a feel for whether she would want to do our hair.  It's her sister, and she'd be more likely to tell my Mom the truth than me.  This approach feels a little bit like a cop out, but whatever.  I'll grow a pair some other time.  My Mom is always asking to help with wedding stuff, so this can be her contribution!

What would you do if you were in my shoes?  Are you having a hard time asking people to help out with wedding stuff?

7 comments:

hitchdied said...

It sounds to me like having your aunt do your hair would be a wonderfully nostalgic experience for both of you! If you are still nervous about asking her, I think your idea of putting out feelers through your mom is hardly a cop-out. It's just following proper channels. Good luck!

kristininjapan said...

Ugh! You've been having a hard time finding decent prices for hair and makeup in LA?!? Oh no! I haven't looked yet but I thought it would be easy! I mean it's LA, the capital of glamour! What I was thinking was having my friends around me to help with my makeup (I've got some pretty talented friends in that area) and if I can't find any cheap hair salons, I'd just go to The Dry Bar in Brentwood, which I read about on Mrs. Meatball's Broke Ass Bride blog. It does blowouts for cheap, which I've never had, but I heard they leave you feeling like a model. I like my hair down anyway!

Seriously, I have some friends that are doing some work for me (photography, videography, helping bake cupcakes and aforementioned makeup, art design) and I've always gotten great responses! Just ask as politely as you can, and make sure to include "I completely understand if you can't!" I've found all my friendors to be happy to help out with their special talents. If you are nervous, you should write to them, that way you can choose your words carefully. Good luck!

Erica said...

@ Kristininjapan

Well, I'm getting married near Lake Arrowhead, so unless I go to one of the very few salons up there, I need to have someone come to me. That's why it's so damn expensive. I'm sure you can find plenty of affordable options if you can just go to a salon. My own hairdresser would be really affordable, but it's just too far for me to drive to her on our wedding day since we're spending the night before the wedding up in the mountains too.

kristininjapan said...

Oh! Right! I wasn't thinking about your destination! Ugh, that is tricky! It would be expensive to bring someone from LA but I would think salons in the area would be cheaper, no? I know you said you're too lazy to drive up to the mountains (hehe) but if your friendor doesn't work out- I've been booking a lot of stuff on blind faith and good reviews. Even though it's scary, hair and makeup are fixable in case it doesn't turn out like you want? Maybe get something done at MAC as a trial and bring a photo to show a stylist up there (if there are?).

Angie said...

Haha! I always ask my mom and sister stuff like this. I see no problem in it at all.

But I think your Aunt and friend would be glad to help! I'm sure they'd think it was an honor to be part of your special day.

JEM - Aqua Bride said...

I agree that they'd think it was an honor to do it. People generally feel flattered that you'd even consider having them be such an important part of your day. Go for it.

Tamar said...

Ask them - I'm sure they'll be really flattered. Some of our relatives are playing music during the cocktail hour and were happy that they got asked to participate in that way. It was also phrased as a wedding gift for us, so then they didn't have to worry about finding a gift.

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